Quarantine Reflections: A SMWC Music Therapy Senior Reflection by Jake Wilson

Jake Wilson playing percussion in Concert Ba

As I write this, Saint Mary-of-the-Woods College has moved online for 7 weeks now and I have seen little else other than the inside walls of my house. The people on social media keep telling people to send love to 2020 graduates because we have just lost the last bit of time with our friends we had before we graduated. We, the graduates of 2020, still are in school so we cannot even focus or think about the abrupt wrenching of that time, or experiences, from our hands. We continue our papers, our readings, and our projects. In some cases, we still meet with our classes online. Yes, the school year has been a challenge by removing many things that motivate us, but we still march on. All of this is to say I have had a month and a half to think about my last four years in the SMWC Music Therapy Program and how it has changed my life.

SMWC Music Therapy Students 2016

It is midmorning on the date I said I would complete this blog post and it astounds me that even after all the positive growth and change I have experienced, procrastination still emerges. I feel stuck and I have no idea what to say. Often times when I don’t know what to say, as a joke, to relieve some of the anxiousness I feel, I say things that other people have said to me in the past like “Rome wasn’t built in a day”, or “Trust the Process”, or “get a haircut you hippie”. I will try to move forward with a metaphor to describe how I arrived at SMWC.

When one door closes, another door opens. I think this is an apt way of describing the way I fell upon the Woods. In my last two years in high school, the music and theatre department grew exponentially. I was there to experience all the growing pains and hardships of building a program from the ground up. As such, I grew attached and proud of my department and when it was finally time to graduate, I was beyond sad. Somewhere in my final semester of high school, when I had resigned myself to going to a state school, a family friend came to me and told me about Music Therapy at SMWC. One door was closing as another door opened for me.

Now, I should note that I do not have a heartfelt story of knowing I was going to go to the Woods since I was 10 or coming to a concert and having an eye-opening experience. No, I never had an Avenue moment. In fact, I did not even know I could attend SMWC until this friend told me and I was instantly interested. I had no clue what music therapy was, but it sounded like it combined my two favorite things: music and psychology. I went about applying to the College and getting my audition materials together. I remember using my solo and ensemble mallet piece for my audition and felt it was awful. I felt I was not a good mallet player. But I was accepted into the program and so stepped through another door.

It just so happens that my freshman year was a year of firsts for the SMWC Music and Theatre Department as well. The SMWC Concert Band was starting back up again, along with a new pep band - I was again part of a growing program. Who better to be a pioneer for a new band than someone who came from a similar band experience? The Concert Band has undergone many changes since I started here at the Woods. Among many things, being part of it has taught me about how to be a peer teacher in subtle ways as new people would come into the percussion section. I have furthered my knowledge of concert band literature and programming. I have worked with a variety of people. Being a part of our Concert Band has taught me even more what it means to work in an ensemble. Being a part of a band is something I hope I can always do throughout my life. Even if I do not always love all the music we play, I love the people and the process that is involved. 

SMWC Pep Band 2016

During my freshman year, I also took the two required semesters of voice lessons (where I found out I was a “musical ninja”. My teacher’s words, not mine) and this led me to join the newly formed Woods Vocal Ensemble (WVE), the first all-male vocal ensemble at SMWC. The WVE and choir experience as a whole has made a huge difference in my life over the past four years. I was never in choir in high school, so I did not know what I was missing out on, but singing in the WVE and with the Chorale has been a peak experience for me in my time at the Woods. It wasn’t always easy, but it was always worth it. Every concert was a joy and there is no better place to sing than the Church of Immaculate Conception. While the final Spring Concert of the year will not be happening, I will always remember the concerts that did happen. I have become a better musician for branching out and being a part of this special ensemble. 

Woods Vocal Ensemble

 I cannot forget the part of the Music and Theatre Department that is directly responsible for my upcoming marriage. The theatre area and the people that reside in it will forever hold a special place in my heart. I met my wonderful fiancée during a production of the Odd Couple a few years ago, and I was part of bringing some incredible works to life on stage. I was able to meet some great people from the community, learn a new skill in running the soundboard, and had my first professional drumming gig with the theatre area. I learned a lot about acting and live action theatre from being on this stage and the classes I took. I think it is in theater where I learned to understand metaphors; and, how to understand the small details that make up a good story.

Finally, I have to discuss my experience in the SMWC Music Therapy Program. Where do I start? The beginning is slow and the end is not quite here. In all honesty, I wrestled back and forth for three years deciding whether music therapy was right for me, but I feel much more confident these days. One thing is for sure: I am a better person for having gone through this program. Even if I decided at some point that music therapy is not for me as a career, I still take solace in the fact that I know more about myself, and the world around me, because of my experiences as a music therapy student.

The music therapy clinical practicum experiences over the years, the countless presentations, and the sheer number of hours I have dedicated to learning new music is daunting, but it made me a better person. The friends I have made through this program have been there through all of my hardships and I through their challenges. The music faculty have pushed me and supported me more than any other group of people I have ever known. The relationships I have built with all of them will last. I know that I have support no matter the issue. I have felt it throughout the years and it continues today.

Music Therapy Practicum April 2017

The class that really cemented my belief that music therapy was for me was Clinical Improvisation. It was like a switch was flipped on in my head and I just “got” it. This was music therapy! Through that improvisation class, and the reflecting upon the improvisations we did, I learned a lot about myself musically, but I also learned a lot about the processing of emotions, how that can look in music, and how to process verbally. I also had a blast connecting with my classmates throughout the semester in new ways. I came away from each class session feeling more connected with my friends. We had inside jokes that we could play out through the music, we were supportive of each other; and, it was just great. It made me realize the power of improvisation and music within our profession. If I can feel this connectedness with my friends, I can feel it with clients and they can feel it too, and then we are really making progress. The class just opened my eyes to a new part of music therapy I had not quite seen before.

SMWC Music Therapy Practicum Dec 2019

Maybe it is the quarantine, but I cannot help but feel the special feeling of the Woods as I think and reflect on my time there. Playing in the pep band to the one person that came to the game, singing “In the Bleak Midwinter” (which is my favorite Christmas song now), setting up a jam session with everybody just to play “What’s Up” for the hundredth time (a proficiency exam required song). These memories and more will stick with me as I go forward into my music therapy internship. These memories will keep me going while I make new ones to add to mosaic of my life. The Cecilian Auditorium and the Conservatory building will forever be a home to me and I cannot wait until I can return and remember all the people and experiences that helped me to become the person I am today.

Ring Day 2019

Senior Reflection Blog Post Author: Jake Wilson, a senior music therapy major, who is in process of applying for an music therapy internship to start in the coming academic year.

Blog Post Editor: Sharon R. Boyle, Associate Professor of Music Therapy and Coordinator of SMWC Undergraduate Music Therapy Program.